Glory be to God for he has strenghten my relationship with Him through a series of emotional events this past months. Here is how it goes,
I use to believe in God on my own terms. Did what i wanted to do with no restrain and knew if i prayed he will forgive me. So i can before January 2011 my l...
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Glory be to God for he has strenghten my relationship with Him through a series of emotional events this past months. Here is how it goes,
I use to believe in God on my own terms. Did what i wanted to do with no restrain and knew if i prayed he will forgive me. So i can before January 2011 my life was stress free; I graduated from Uni last October, did the regular job hunt and had a fantastic gf ( whom i dated for 3 yrs) who loved me, and i loved as well. Unfortunately due to my love of women, i gave into temptation a couple of times and cheated on her.
Comes January 2011, a big canadian firm is hiring for one position. The pay is fantastic for a new graduate. About 10 people are interviewed for the same position amongst which i am one. Having been dissapointed from previews interview, and knowing i have no real job experience in the field, i go through the interview as a formality knowing theres no way i will be getting the job. Little did i know God had a different plan for me - I AM OFFERED THE POSITION.
At 21yrs old i find my dream job with a fantastic salary (60 000), yes God has throughly blessed me.
Everything flows well for the next couple of days. I decide to change my ways, pamper my gf to whom i have been foul, always praying to God to strengthen my relationship with her and help me change my deceitful ways. Decided to take our relationship to the next level by getting her an engagement ring...i mean why not right? being that its time for me to lay the foundations of a family life being that i have this great career ahead of me - again, little did i know God had a different plan for me.
February 14th, as i about to propose to my lovely GF, she drops the bomb..." its not the same anymore, i love you but i am not inlove any more...i need time to figure my life out like you did yours ..please lets stay friends.". In a flip of a second, my world did a 360dg change of direction. Two weeks later, she texts me saying she has a new bf and that i should forget her.
I am crushed, the more i pray the more she hurts me. I am confused, why this? why bless me with a gift , then take away another part of me? why did he do this when i constately prayed for a stronger relationship with her?.
I cried, my job was in jeopardy as i could not focus at work ( which was bad i had 6 months of probation through which i should be proving myself). Lost 15 pounds in 2 weeks. Couldn't sleep.
One thing i gained from this experience is a closer relationship with God. Through my pain, i prayed intensively for God to reunite me with her/heal me. Overtime though, i developed a habit of praying not for my own need but for the glory of the Lord. I regularly attend church service now (Catholic), still pray intensively, and trying to change my sinful manners. I want to be Good person as a son of God and as a human. I am more suceptible to others pain as i understand it and can almost feel it. I am more sensible about inflcting pain on others aswell. God have surrounded me with people who love me (this helped reduce my pain as i felt loved). Plus, i can honestly say after 3 months, i am almost completely healed from my break up. I just started seeing this amazing christian Girl with whom i click better than with my ex and i hope God blesses this undertaking by making it develop into a full and healthy relationship. Yes the Lord is great and i want to praise him everyday.
One last word,
Being African, my dream has always been to eventually go back and help my people out of poverty to the best of my abilities. Knowing this would be a very challenging undertaking, i always prayed for God to give me a wife who would share the same vision as me, and be that rock i can lean on when i go through the rough patches. Meaning a wife strong in character, dynamic, loving and ambitious. My ex was honestly non of that....being with her meant i had to settle.
My guess is this breakup was because God doesn't want me to settle. He will bring forth that wife i need in order to accomplish my mission. So in terms of relationships, my prayer is for him to fix and blessmy marriage into the heavens with his angels, before having me consume it on earth. To consult with his Angels in heaven to pick my wife .
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